People-Pleasing

7 ways to free yourself from the need for approval

People-Pleasing is an issue that affects just about all of us in one way or another. The need to seek approval tends to be ingrained in our personalities, and sometimes it can feel impossible to separate ourselves from it. But it’s not only possible, it’s inevitable that we come into our full, empowered selves.

Here are seven ways to free yourself from people-pleasing and the need to seek approval:

1) Give yourself full permission to be yourself

Life is designed to work best when you are true to yourself.

This is really about empowerment. We need to look at why care so much about what other people think of us.

We learn when we’re young that approval feels good and disapproval feels bad, and this is how our parents and teachers guide us. But it becomes so much a part of our identity that we continue NEEDING approval long after we’re old enough to make up our own minds about how to live.

You can’t be motivated by a need to please others and be yourself at the same time, so begin to give yourself permission to just be yourself.

2) Empower yourself to be guided from within

You need to be yourself in order to be a true creator. Get to know who you really are, apart from the need to please others. Begin to live from your own code of conduct (what feels “right” to you regardless of others' opinions). Tune in to your inner wisdom and honor it, even if others don’t.

3) Bring authenticity to your relationships

Strong, healthy relationships are built on two people being authentic--relationships can’t be healthy and strong if they’re not genuine.

Take an honest look at what your relationships are based on--are you afraid to be yourself? How comfortable are you saying no, or voicing your own differing opinions?

Stop requiring permission from others in order to live from your own inner wisdom.

4) Examine your underlying motives, and identify your true intentions

Start paying attention to the way you operate. Look at your goals, and identify your underlying motivation. Does it involve people-pleasing or the need for approval?

Recognize that every time you do something in order to get approval, you move away from your authentic self.

5) Let go of the need to compare

This is a way of operating that keeps us insecure and needing approval. Instead, get to know who you really are, and focus on expressing from your authentic self, without comparing yourself to others.

Become engaged in creating, without seeking approval for what you create.

6) Stay focused in the present

In the present there is room for expansion and a space where inner wisdom can come forth. Use this moment to tune into to your body and access your own inner wisdom and guidance.

7) Live and create from your authentic self

Concentrate on what you want to create and let that be your focus. There are so many beautiful things wanting to come forth from inside you once you stop needing permission and approval. Life is supporting you in being yourself, and the world needs to experience your authentic expression.

Just keep bringing this subject of people-pleasing to your conscious awareness, and you will find yourself more and more able to make empowered, authentic decisions.

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